Tag Archives: Gary Neville

Monday Football Ramblings – 11 April 2016 – Leicester City Keep Rolling, Arsenal Draw in a Classic, Barcelona faulter, and Good ol’ Gary Wins!


The Race for the Barclays Premier League Title: The Leicester Citys freight train keeps moving while the Tottenham Hotspur steam locomotive stay right behind them.

This weekend saw the end of any title hopes for the Arsenal who drew against West Ham United (we’ll get to that later)

In a tricky match against a relegation threatened Sunderland it took Leicester City 66 minutes to open the scoring. In the 90th minute, Jamie Vardy capped off his brace when waltzed around the Sunderland keeper to net the ball home.

Sunderland 0-2. Leicester City

That win meant the chasing Tottenham Hotspur, who were playing later on that day, had to produce the goods against Manchester United, a team they have only beaten once in 14 years.

So you could say they odds were stacked against them.

But, this is Louis van Gaal Manchester United we are talking about.

It took some time for Spurs to open that stubborn United defense but once they did the floodgates of heaven opened. Not only did they beat – excuse my French- they crap out of a pathetic Manchester United but they did it with some dabbin’ too. (look up the word up in the urban dictionary, please)

Tottenham Hotspur 3 – 0. Manchester United

Like my favourite chunky RnB singer Adele once said in a song

This Barclays Premier League race “it isn’t over.”

Scrap for the Top 4 places: West Ham United and Arsenal drew in a 6 goal classic, Manchester United get a hiding,  and City comes from behind to beat West Brom

a carroll

Same old s**t, just a different day for the Gunners. I feel I have to say that again, It’s the same old SHIT, just a different day. They are out of the championship race and now are only looking to secure a champions league spot.

Let’s say (type) it all together now we want #wengerout

Arsenal and West Ham United gave us one of the games of the season.

It went a bit like this;

M. Ozil scores 1-0

A. Sanchez scores 2-0

West Ham United are worried now…

Before halftime, a cross comes in Andy Carroll (does what Andy Carrol does) scores with his head, 1-2

On the stroke of halftime Andy Carroll, this time, a bicycle kick scores again! 2-2

7 minutes after halftime Andy Carroll scores a hattrick!!! 3-2

Wenger is about to have a stroke or a cerebral hemorrhage…

Dimitri Payet does Dimitri Payet things, making other footballers look inferior 

70th minute L. Koscielny equalises 3-3!

This game is crazy!

Back and forth till the 90th minute.

phew! let me catch my breath…

Everytime Louis van Gaal seems like he is coming right, he goes and does something like this.

Manchester United do not lose to Tottenham Hotspur, but he did, 3-0.

Did I mention that LvG decided to play Jesse Lingard (a player I hate by the way) at number 10 and played Juan Mata,  a number 10, out on the wing.

Oh did I mention he took off Rashford (fair enough, he may have been struggling) for Ashley Young, a player who hasn’t played in months and DECIDED TO PLAY HIM (A WINGER) AT CENTRE FORWARD WITH ANTHONY MARTIAL ON THE PITCH!

And oh yeah before I forget did I mention how much I hate Louis van Gaal?

Manchester City did what they had to do against West Bromwich Albion and it seems more than likely that they will clinch that 4th spot.

Survivor: Relegation Edition:  Norwich City, Newcastle, Sunderland, and Aston Villa all lose


All four of the bottom four lost this weekend.

As things stand, there seems like there is only one spot up for grabs. Aston Villa is already relegated so Sam’s Sunderland, Rafa’s Newcastle, and the guy who isn’t popular enough for me to remember his name’s Norwich have it all to fight for.

The La Liga Wars – Episode 32: Barcelona fails to win against Real Sociedad at home, again. Sociedad aren’t a hoodoo they are more of a voodoo team, Real smash Eibar and Atlético Madrid take care of Espanyol


Just when you thought La Liga was all over.

Ronaldo and Madrid flatten an Eibar side who weren’t up for it and Atlético also show us how coming back from a deficit is done.

Barcelona, on the other hand,  lost their second game in a row at Sociedad which makes them only 3 points behind Atletico and only 4 points behind Madrid with 6 games to play.

Real Sociedad shut down the spaces through the middle and let them have it on the wings. Barcelona didn’t do much with the ball that they did have. Messi hardly had a kick of the ball.

Was this the tactical genius of another coach who isn’t popular enough for me to remember his name or is Barcelona just tired.

They look knackered. The number of competitive games that they are playing is taking a toll on their small squad.

The Adventures of Gary Neville in Spain: Hey everybody, great news! Gary Neville won a game of football in Spain!

With this last minutes goal


Article by: Thabang Kgeledi @Chiz_ZoBoSportz

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Monday Football Ramblings 14 March 16

The Race for the Barclays Premier League Title: Tottenham defeat the pathetic Aston Villa, Manchester City slips up… again, and Leicester is still to play.


Tottenham put the pressure back on to Leicester City by moving within 2 points of them with the win against Aston Villa. Only a fool would have betted against Spurs winning this game.Aston Villa is making a strong case to be the 2nd worst team in Premier League history (Derby County in 2007 managed to only win 11 points in their whole campaign so they are undoubted the worst team we have seen in the EPL). Manchester City was also playing against a relegation-threated team. But unlike Tottenham, they couldn’t put the lowly Norwich City to the sword. With the draw, Man City slip further away from the title and. Good luck fixing this mess Pep. Leicester plays tonight against another team who is fighting for their premier league lives, Newcastle. This won’t be easy because Newcastle has appointed my 2nd favourite manager in the world (after Costadine Papic) Rafa Benitez and the players will be looking to impress.


The La Liga Wars – Episode 29: Barcelona batter Getafe, Atletico Madrid do likewise against Deportivo, and Real Madrid scrape past Las Palmas


Even though Leo Messi missed ANOTHER penalty (Barcelona have missed 10 this season) it was another thrashing of a small team by a big team in La Liga. It seems like small teams in La Liga capitulate after Real Madrid or Barcelona score the first 3 goals in a game. Atletico also had a handsome home 3-0 win against Deportivo. Zidane and his Real Madrid side didn’t have it so easy in their game against Las Palmas. After Real Madrid scored their first goal early on I thought it would be one of those customary Real Madrid-against-a-small-team-7-0 (with Ronaldo scoring four of them) kind of match. It didn’t turn out that way. Only one goal down in the 2nd half Las Palmas threaten, and they got their goal to equalise. In the last minutes of the game, Real Madrid found a winner with a header from Casamero. Unconvincing. The story of Real Madrid season.

The Adventures Gary Neville in Spain: Gary Neville loses… again.


After making a good run at the end of February (winning 4 of 5 games). Gary Neville is back to square one. In March Gay Neville’s Valencia have lost 3 of the 4 of their games. The way things are going I’d be surprised if good ol’Gary lasts another month.


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Monday Football Ramblings: 07 March 16

The race for the Barclays Premier League Title: North London derby ends in a stalemate and Leicester increase their lead at the top


The contest for the Barclays premier league is getting more interesting as every week passes. The games are more intense, each and every point counts, and Arsene Wenger’s hair gets greyer. The match that was dubbed (by the English press) as the most important North London derby of all time lived up to the hype. Great atmosphere, Greater passion, and greaterER goals! Spurs 2 – 2 Arsenal! Okay, so maybe only one of the goals was great but it was still a very good match.

But… (There always seems to be a but when it comes to Arsenal lately)

…even though the game was a wonderful spectacle, the result, wasn’t so wonderful for either of these north London sides. Log leaders Leicester stretched their lead at the top by beating Watford 1 – 0. With 10 games to go Leicester are 5 points in front of Tottenham and 8 ahead of Arsenal.

…and in the news about teams that were, but now, aren’t so relevant: Chelsea draw. Again. Manchester City trounces a pathetic Aston Villa. Aston Villa might as well play their youth team because their first team is a disgrace. Manchester United lose thanks to a Juan Mata sending off.

yeah anyway

Enough about those teams…

Nedbank Cup: Orlando Pirates defeat Komphela’s Kaizer Chiefs, Mamelodi Sundowns make hard work of beating a team lower league team


Most people (including moi [that’s me in French]) have been complaining about the Soweto derby. They (moi again [my French is pretty good, don’t you think?]) have been saying that the derby has been boring lately. Well, sorry to disappoint you guys, but this one was no different. Yaaawwwwwwwn! The only benefit of the Soweto derby nowadays is that you have a great excuse to give your significant other when you want to go out for the weekend “baby, so you know its Pirates v Chiefs this weekend and you know I can’t miss it! So meand my boys are going to watch it at [insert single friends name here]’s place, I’ll be back this evening”(beware ladies). Anyway, it got interesting after the 77th when Ndoro scored the games opener by cracking in a close range shot that almost dicapitated the Chiefs keeper. Another goal from the blonde mohawked striker soon followed. Ndoro brace. Orlando Pirates 2 – 0 Kaizer Chiefs. Mamelodi Sundowns, who played their first team squad, found it tricky against lower league opposition but were bailed out by Dolly extra time goal.


The La Liga Wars – Episode 28: Barcelona sweep aside opposition, Ronaldo scores four goals, and Atletico give bad Gary a hiding


Ronaldo shuts his mouth and plays football. He scored a stunning four goals. Two of the four goals being pretty good goals. And on top of all of that he (kind of) celebrated when Bale scored. Real Madrid is moving in the right direction I would say. By scoring those four goals Ronaldo took his overall La Liga tally to 252 goals in just 228 games. This puts his second all-time in La Liga behind his crush Lionel Messi who is on 304. Speaking of which, Messi also had a stunning game with two goals and one assist.

In this week’s episode of…

The Adventures Gary Neville in Spain:  Simeone shows Gary how things should be done.

Gary Neville had another off night.


Then end.

Article by: Thabang Kgeledi @Chiz_ZoBoSportz

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Monday Football Ramblings: 29 February 16

Race for the Barclays Premier League Title: Leicester City steal it in the dying minutes of the game, Tottenham come from behind, and Arsenal get beaten by teenagers


It was another exciting weekend in the Premier League. Unlikely log leaders Leicester City topped the league by only two points by the start of the weekend. Lowly Norwich City came to visit the King Power stadium and it was expected that high scoring Leicester would put them to the sword. Well, It wasn’t to be that easy. Leicester only managed to score in the last minutes of the game to steal the 3 points. If Norwich had a better striker than Cameron Jerome (who was his usual horrible self)  they may have came away with something from this match. End of Saturday Leicester City 5 points ahead Spurs and Arsenal.

End of Saturday: Leicester City 5 points ahead Spurs and Arsenal.

Arsene Wenger and his title favourite Arsenal (according to the odds makers) visited Louie van Gaal and his team of underaged nobodies. Manchester United has 16 senior players injured. So LVG had to play a team of teenagers who probably haven’t hit puberty yet. Arsenal should have won this match. But, instead, made a hero out of 9-year-old, excuse me, 18-year-old Marcus Rashford who scored a brace. Arsenal’s north London rivals Tottenham came back from a goal down to beat a good Swansea City side.

Louis Van Gaal Entertaining us further by making an idiot of himself.

End of Sunday: Leicester City 2 points ahead of Spurs and 5 points ahead of Arsenal.

Capital One Final: City triumphant on penalties


This was an entertaining cup final. End to end stuff. City scored first. City looked the better team for most of the game but complacency, bad refereeing decisions, and Raheem Sterling brought Liverpool back into the match.  Philippe Coutinho scores!  1-1. Extra time.

A quick note on Raheem Sterling: This guy isn’t worth 49 million. Thank you.

In extra time both teams looked knackered. Then again Yaya Toure does look fatigued in every match he plays in. 30 minutes are up. Penalties. City keeper Willy Caballero makes 3 great stops. The Spaniard in the hero. Raheem Sterling breathes a sigh of relief.

A quick note on Raheem Sterling: If he spent more time practising to be a better a player than getting his hair done he may be a better player

Gary Neville in Spain: Valencia 0- 3 Ath. Bilbao. Is it back to square one?


The scoreline isn’t as bad as it looks. Okay it is. But, Valencia conceded the first goal in the 73rd minuted and two more 5 minutes later. This loss snapped Gary’s four-game winning streak.

The La Liga Wars – Episode 27: Atletico slay Ronaldo Madrid at the Bernabeu once again, and Barcelona keep racking up the points.

GRA321. BARCELONA, 28/02/2016.- El delantero del FC Barcelona Neymar (c) felicita a Leo Messi (d) tras marcar ante el Sevilla, durante el partido de Liga en Primera División que están disputando esta noche en el Camp Nou, en Barcelona. EFE/Alejandro García

Real Madrid can’t seem to find a way to beat Simeone’s Atletico Madrid. This is Atlei’s third consecutive win over Los Blancos. Real Madrid title hopes are all but over. ZIzou should and is going to get fired soon. Crisitiano Ronaldo, in a post match interview, noted that if all his teammates were on the same level as him Real Madrid would be number 1 [click here if u missed it]. Really? We all know Ronaldo is an a**hole but he may have taken it too far this time. He missed two clear-cut chances and really didn’t do much else in that game. So he should take a good hard look at himself in one of his 84 mirrors he has in his house. Barcelona had a tough game against Sevilla. Messi scored a brilliant free kick to get them level after then went behind early. Pique, in the second half, produced the game winner.


Premier  Soccer League Big Three in Africa: Kaizer Chiefs win a hard fought walk-over, Mamelodi Sundowns win against a world class Chicken Inn FC and Bidvest Wits make light work on Light Stars

Katlego Mashego of Mamelodi Sundowns during the 2015 Telkom Knockout Final match between Mamelodi Sundowns and Kaizer Chiefs at Moses Mabhida Stadium, Durban on the 16 December 2015 ©Muzi Ntombela/BackpagePix

Quick Summary: Kaizer Chiefs’ were handed a free win after the opposition didn’t pitch. Mamelodi Sundowns made life difficult for themselves by not putting away a team named after a fast food franchise. Bidvest beat Light Stars 9-0 on aggregate.



Article by: Thabang Kgeledi @Chiz_ZoBoSportz

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